Friday, December 5, 2014


Life Coach Joe Vulgamore Speaks on Fear

Mindful Tips for Transcending Fear...

Fear... it is the number one thing that robs us of our joy. Fear is one of the most prolific, ever-present blockers to confidence, happiness, or success.

But did you know that fear and courage are really the same thing, just on opposite ends of the scale? It's true. They are both simply states of awareness that occupy opposite ends of our perception.

We have all heard the cliche's about facing our fears and making ourselves stronger... so why can't we do it? Most of the time, it is because we do not really understand the emotion itself. Fear is neither negative nor positive. It simply is. As with everything else, it is the way that we react to fear that determines with which pole it will align. 

Fear can have many positive aspects. It raise our awareness in dangerous situations. It can temporarily heighten our senses to help protect us. It can cause a "fight or flight" reaction that also serves to protect us... these are just a few examples of positive effects of fear. But for many, it causes a mental shut down. It causes a temporary paralysis. It can cause a breakdown in emotions that can very difficult for some to recover.

If you are walking down the street, minding your own business, and a large rabid dog comes from around a fence and begins to run at you with a salivating mouth, loud growls and barking, and evil in it's eyes; fear is going to be suddenly present. At that very moment you have three choices... stand your ground and prepare to fight... run away... or mentally and physically shut down. Only one of those options is certain to be negative. If you stand your ground, you may be able to intimidate or fight off the dog. If you run away, you may be able to escape unharmed. But if you shut down mentally and physically, the dog is likely to tear you apart. One could also charge fears head on... but for many people that is neither possible nor likely. Some people just cannot muster the courage to do so.

We as people do the same thing to ourselves when we fear our own emotions. We are presented with the same three choices. And like with the dog analogy, only one is sure to bring us a negative effect.

If we stand to face the emotion, despite the fact that it scares us, we stand a good chance of beating that fear. If we flee from the emotion we can possibly escape (escaping emotions is usually only temporary but it gives us an opportunity to regroup our thoughts before we return to face it). Or we can mentally and physically shut down and take the long ride on the backward swing of the pendulum.

Letting fear shut us down, no matter the circumstance, is sure to bring us a negative effect. It has far-reaching effects that can cause us long-term damage and prevent us from future joys. Our reaction to fear can cause us misery in relationships with friends, family, significant others, and professional relationships. Our reactions to fear can cause us misery in achieving wealth, health, and happiness. It has been known, in extreme cases, to cause severe depression, post traumatic stress, and even suicides. Fear can be a truly deadly enemy if we react to it in the wrong way.

So how do we transcend fear? 

That is a question easier answered than practiced. 

In reality, you cannot escape fear. Sooner or later any fear that you escape is going to come back around as they always do, and sometimes with a vengeance. Even if you conquer fear, you will still feel a twinge of it when faced with a fearful scenario.

The only real way to deal with fear is to learn to live in co-existence with it... remember, it is your reaction to fear that makes it positive or negative. You must learn to "make friends" with fear. That is the only way to transcend fear.

Mindful Awareness allows us to work with our fears to bring about more pleasant resolutions to situations and circumstances. When we are present and aware, observing without judgement or attachment, and accepting the Now with a compassionate heart, fear is diminished in it's power over us.

When we are mindful, we respond to fear rather than react. We ensure our own safety because our awareness is high. We ensure a better outcome because we release our expectations and replace judgement with discernment. We find harmony because we allow it to be.

Here are a few steps to help you learn to transcend.

1. Recognize triggers - Be mindful and recognize situations that trigger your fears before they happen. Be mindful of you physical sensations, they are indicators of your deeper feelings. Recognizing them can help you to be conscious of your choices, allowing you to respond rather than react

2. Take baby steps - Venturing into a fearful situation at a slower pace can build confidence. If you take baby steps, you can stay mindful of your triggers and often find more courage. You can always remove yourself when it becomes too overwhelming, but you will have gained the confidence to know you can go so far. Then the next time, you can take another step further... and then another... and another.

3. Keep your eyes on your path - Do not focus on the obstacles. Observing your path from a higher perspective will make it easier to avoid or climb over the obstacles. Physically, our bodies tend to go where our eyes go, it is the same mentally... our emotions tend to go where our mind goes (when we are conscious of it). Keeping our mind on the Here and Now, being totally present, brings awareness and clarity.

4. Celebrate each step - Give yourself proper and duly deserved credit for each step you take in transcending your fears. This is a compassionate act. No one ever said that conquering them would be easy. You deserve to take joy in each of these small successes... so show a little Compassion toward yourself.

5. Reflect on the source of your fears - once a fearful situation has passed, and you have celebrated your successes, think about those situations that bring up fear. You might also think about where that fear might have developed. Chances are your fear did not materialize overnight. It may have grown out of childhood tales, teachings, traumas, or some other type of interference in your life. If you are able to find its root cause, you may be able to better see the limiting belief that is causing it is falling away.

Once you can come to terms with your fears and change your reactions to them, you will begin to feel joys that you only dreamed were possible. You will know the joys of self-confidence, self-assuredness, and self-reliance. There is nothing more liberating than that.

Stay Zen!

If you're interested in learning more about Mindful Awareness and how it can increase the quality of your life, Contact Me HERE. and let's chat.

Joe Vulgamore CHT is author of the Best-selling book "Alignment- Law of Attraction and the Seven Universal Laws" and "Powerful Powerful You - Understanding Your Power". He is a Life Coach, Hypnotherapist, and Holistic Healer. For almost 30 years, Joe has helped thousands of people from over 14 countries, across 5 continents, to make life-transformations through one-to-one coaching, books, and workshops.

Portions of this article are excerpted from Joe's book "Alignment - Law of Attraction and the Seven Universal Laws"


  1. With the HIGHEST and DEEPEST <3 felt Gratitude <3 !!! The Highest Good <3 !!! The Highest Love <3 !!!!
    Thank you for this and Better <3 !!! ABRACADABRA!!!!! AND SO IT IS <3 !!!